Everything Science Forum

A long and dangerous mission....ok...we can do that

Take the ISS Rustbucket, ISS FallingApart, and the ISS LastLegs out, go beyond the peanut trail, and sneak aboard the cloaked Bozo Super Battle Tent from behind. Locate the "false enitity" and place a homing beacon. Capture at least a few of the unknown race that is assisting.

You will need a few assistance....I suggest you take our resident spook....Snazee, and our Lounge lizard Archibald. We will need to break into their computer system and download their archives, the assistance of SunSpots4Ever, our ship's librarian would be an excellent choise. Stop in the bar and have Sarah90 join your crew, she can get you out of rough situations. You will need medical and combat personel. I would recommend taking BlackNebula with you.

After you have completed those tasks, you will need to cut off any attempts of escape by the Bozo's

A good pilot will also be needed. I would have recommended Phil, but his whereabouts are unknown, since he kamikazeed into the Bozo. See if Rover will be your pilot.

I am sending the wing back to the WAN they need to refuel. When the team comes out I will be here waiting. I'm shutting down my engines to save fuel but am keeping my cloaking device on. When you get out here I will dock up. Just get a data relay transmitter and I'm sure there will be more bozo data to read then SunSpots4Ever could imagine. Maybe we could even capture the tent if we had compleat control of the computer.

Please remember that our 'agreement' with the Bozos does not allow our attack, unless in self defense.

But I rather just take 1 ship and its smaller counter parts with fighters.  I'm sure that USS Alantra could do much better alone than all those ships put together.

Labatt,
Well aware of the Alantra would be an excellent ship for the mission, but if the Bozo's do not detect the Alantra in front of them, they would be very suspecious.
I figure the rejects from the scrap he...opps....the excellent ships assigned to this mission would be the perfect choise for the mission.  They are state of the art war vehicals.  (maybe 1000 of years ago, geeze, they were even rejected by the junk men as being beyood any salvage value whatsoever. I hope those rust buckets will hold together, lets face it, not even a Bozo would be dumb enough to fly those pieces of junk).  Top of the line cloaking devices!!  (So what if it is a black piece of cloth taped over the ships) The best weapons around (if you realized that a peashooter would do more damage)

Meteoriod, that is my intention, if we are able to capture it, look at all of the intellegence we would gain....if it becomes too difficult, we will destory it, as we escape through the blackhole.


The WAN III lines up on the 4th Bozo Tent, The Big Gun fires...the WAN misses, but the 5th Bozo tent recieves the full blunt of the blast, it explodes sending a blast wave the destoryes the 4th Bozo...

Admiral, we are going to need to take the BIG gun offline and let it cool...it is over heating distorting our aiming.  Being cloaked is not allowing it to cool down quickly...Mons, Nemisis, how is it going with the Bozo's allies???


AOB, you have an agreement not to attack the Bozo's...but does your agreement cover their new allies????

The agreement does not allow us to attack for your defense, only our own...so it should also not be connected to their allies...so it should be within the agreement to attack their allies without provocation.

Apparently we have been getting behind. Who are their allies?

D@#n. Why didn't somebody (that's a BIG ol' hint, P) gimme a yell down in the library? I was catchin' up on some tech stuff.

It's okay, Dingo, I've got the Big Guns now. Bringing 'em down to cool off.

*BLEEP* "This is the Draconis, ready for battle. Will be entering system in a few hours. We're charged and ready. Termina's at the helm, we figured out a way to jack her into the systems without a mind-link. She says in return for dishing out the pain she has to have dinner with Nemisis though. Can someone get that arranged?" *BLEEP*

Nemisis....normally I would not do this...but...after the battle you are headby requested to meet Termina for a private dinner at a location of her choise and timing..

We still have 9 bozo tents around that need to be dispatched, also one very powerful, but hidden Bozo Battle tent heading into this direction.

Unknown number of Arturian ships approching at high speed, within a few days.

Arturians:  Race - unknown
               Species unknown
               Technology level:  unknown, but sensors indicaate they have some advanced technology greater than the WAN in some area, lesser in others.  Only known fact...they are allies of the Bozo forces

Crumbs Dingo!  I think you may have invited me here by accident!?  :huh!? (http://www.freakygamers.com/smilies/s/cwm/cwm/freak3.gif ):huh!?    Thanks!...but have no idea what to offer!?

 (Give me exact coordinates and I'll do me best!...Or... will just disappear, as the case may be...)!  

Good Luck!   :hat (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/pimp.gif ):hat    (dips hat, hangs ciggie out of corner of mouth whilst remembering PLC's original :hat (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/pimp.gif ):hat ...)...genuflects... Decides this is not a good position whilst going into Bozo Battle Tent so, Flexes Muscles...  :\ (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/ohwell.gif ):\

The Draconis appears from its Blink Jump, still glowing in the after-energies of the jump sequence. The blade and wings of the Draconis are draped in a shimmering light that seems to emmanate from the interior. These are only the first few seconds as it comes out from its jump however. With a sudden burst of energy, the large freighter begins rolling towards the Bozo's, at full speed, like a huge whirring saw blade.

"TERMINA! WHAT THE SOGGGING LILIEH ARE YOU DOING?!?!" Laugi screams as he is thrown around from the spinning of the Draconis.
"Trust me," Termina says calmly, jerking her head towards him causing the jack cord plug in her head to become visible. the cord reached down and was connected with the control panel.

They have detected us. They are also cloaked. They have more advanced technology than we do.

WARNING!! WANING!!! ISS RUSTBUCKET SHEILDS AT LOW LEVEL. POSSIBLE DESTRUCTION: 90%

Let's bring her in Dingo.

The only Bozo ship currently here is the  BS ABS. I can not determain how many Arturian ships that are out there. I have knowledge that the Bozo's have called for reinforments.Somehow the Bozo's learned diplomacy.

What should I do? I don't know where the Arturian ships are. Shall I fire only on the BS ABS since we know where it is? This could get worse.

Wait!!!!

*I type something in on the keyboard*

Navigation: See how many Arturian ships you can get cordinates of.

Launching flares in 3...2...1...


I am counting 11 Arturian Battle Cruisers.

Let's launch another one.


@#$% an Arturian mother ship.

Admiral... Ships are un cloaking ready ffor an all out battle. I have called for help by the Venusians (our closest ally) but they reject saying they don't want a  piece of the Arturians. They also said they don't want to get near the blackhole.

What shall I do?

The AI attempts to hack the Arturian vessels.
Hailing Arturian ship...hail rejected
Looking for comlink...no operational one found
This isn't working. Most fleet ships have an emergency uplink that forces ship to ship communication. A blast of codes at different frequencies blast the Arturian ship.
Scanning for frequency force open...found
Looking for force open protocols...enabled
Routing bandwidth...done
Disabling user interface...done
Sys shut down found...disabled
WARNING Connection being compromised
WARNING Sentinel detected
Scanning sentinel...weakness found
Disabling sentinel...done
Sys take over...compleat
Downloading files...done
Shutting down weapons...done
Shutting down engines...done
Shutting down defenses...done
Establishing permanent uplink...done
Planting sentinels...10 in place
WANIII this is the AI I have disabled the Arturian flag ship and have used it to send a stand down Command to the rest of there fleet. What do you with me to do with it. I also have the data taken from there library I can download it to WAN if wished.

[embed]http://www.eletech.com/triumph1.wav" hidden="false" showcontrols="true" autoplay="false]

The ISS LastLegsOut and the ISS FallingApart are disabled. The ISS LLO will make it back.If they fire on the ISS FA it will go boom. I am resorting to tactical maneuvers.

Wish me good luck. ( Alantra flies out of port)

blacknebula rporting for duty sir. I'm ok but a little dizzy.

*Drinks vodka*

So what up dingo dog? Do you need me combat training? If so I got a gun and I know how to use it.

"YAAAAAAAAH!" Termina screams.

The Draconis' blink blade slashes through several ships, cutting them cleanly in half. The ensuing reactor bursts destroy the non-repair modules on the tents, killing the inhabitants.
The Draconis continues rolling, still slashing through the tents that are still in his way.

"Uhh, Termi, how do we stop?"
"Hold on, sog it!"

The Draconis lurches into a resting position, upside down compared to the rest of the Bozo fleet. The blink blade slowly loses its glow, becoming nothing more than an extension of the hull in a few moments. During those moments however, the blink wings began to charge up.

"I'll show you how to pilot a blink ship, Dracone."

The Draconis leaves existence for a split second, reappearing just quick enough to slice open a tent. The another from a different angle. And again and again. Blink blink blink. Like an artful Samuri dodging and striking his foes.

"KLESA SCH INU DA MOYA!"
"VEL CHE  KURANDO!"
The two warriors stare at each other as great beams of Chasi fly towards the other.
"SOG!"
They both doge away as fast as possible, the ensuing explosions sending most of the virtual world into pieces.
The two Nerds appear next to each other, aimed and ready to do the other one in.
*"You're out."
*"So are you."
The two Nerds tear at each other, a torrent of punches kicks and blocks. They jump away from each other, and then come tearing back. Again, each meets fury with fury, and they are forced to break apart.
"Give up yet?"
"Sog you."
They again clash, this time with more force then ever. One of them blasts the other in the face. Then the other kicks him to the side, sending him flying across the landscape. A Chasi ball trails him, and connects, sending him even further.
The beaten Nerd lies on the ground, decidly the loser from his lack of health. The victor stands over him, and Unesyes him into non-existence.

"How did you beat me?"
"I already fought you. I just remembered why I lost."
"Being from the future should be against the rules."

Please send all the data you have to me via any secure channel you can locate. My recording device will scan and lock onto your signal, and download the data onto microdisk. I will then see that the disks get to WAN Intelligence agents...

"Termi, does this thing have any GUNS?"
"Party pooper. Not many, and they're not hooked up. I'm uploading the instructions for installation into your neural nets as we speak."
"Where would we be without mind-links?"
"Someplace simpler."
"Right. I'll have the guns ready in a few minutes."
"Gee, that long? I'll have finished them off by then!"

Sarah, accually you are one of the perfect canidates for the mission....you are so deseptively disarming.  One look of the crew assembled for the mission would even disarm the Bozo's thinking that the group was harmless...

Let's see:

One librarian,
One Lounge Lizard
One party girl
One doctor who generates his own patience
One young pilot
One known spy
Let by a field commander

All on old ships...would you expect such a force as being dangerous...even though if you really think about it, It is one of the most unpredictable and deadly teams around

I've cleaned up the left side.  The Factory ship I went after exploded right after they made the jump to hyper-active space.  I found no pods or survivors.  I wonder if we have some friends around.

Anyway, left side is clear and covered.  All fighters are patrolling the area.  Nothing's getting in here.  Well, not in one piece anyway.  Awaiting further orders.

Mons, ISS BozoBlaster.

Rover, keep the ship out there, we have the Bozo's allies temporarily disabled.  We have got to find the Bozo's primary circus tent......We have been able to detect slight traces, and the data is suggesting........Borg technology, but badly distorted?????

Communication intersepts of th Bozo's allies communications are....(shuddering) circus music..so we definitely have Bozos

Admiral, the BIG GUN has cooled down by 10%..We could cool it a lot quicker, but if we do, we would need to uncloak to be able to rediate out heat...But we would be instantly detected and our trap would be discovered for what it is....We have destoyed most of the Bozo's screening vessals...but sensors are detecting more Bozo circus tents on the way

Mons maintain station, we have detected incoming Bozo forces.....3 battle fleets so far, but uncoordenated arrive times...Lets eat them up and spit them out...I just hope their ringleader does not get it's act together, else we would be in big trouble

When you get to the 'big trouble' let us know.

Captain I just looked up at antenna mast. It has cotton candy with peanut shells in it all over it. We have to be getting close. I just down linked  the info to the WAN.

From:  Bozo Intellegence Command
To:     All Bozo Forces

Subj:  WAN III fleet detected

All Bozo forces form up at -15473.+22341.0.

Set up outer tents, and midway....  Make preperations for arrive of our new main show tent.  The new one with the 5 rings instead of standard 3.

It is apparent that the WAN is stationary.  We have detected our missing clowns in arms barricaded in a cage.  Coordinate with Ring Master Schvundza, and his BozoBorg suicide teams to retrieve our clowns.

Our Allies the Arthurians, have been experencing some technical difficulties, but have released the worms to track down and take control of their computer systems.

Remimber our mission...to capture the WAN III intact, along with those &*^$%$# ships the ISS BozoBlaster and the ISS Alantea...They have been thorns in our side long enough.  Keep on the lookout for the following individuals:  PLC, Nemisis, Labatt, SkyJim, Dingo, Nerd57, Laugi, Termina, Meteoroid.  Watch out for MIB agents.  If on the off chance you accidently capture Aaron of Borg, he is to be released into the care of the BozoBorg....All other's are concidered to be in need of reeducation into the truths as professed by our great leader.  Expect resistance to our enlightenment efforts by their best ships.  Watchout for flying junk piles, we do not want to scratch our new tents.  They are of no threat to us.

Institute manuveer "Chineese fire drill in 24 hours"

LONG LIVE ART BELL

YEEEEEEE!!!!!!!I'm not on the list.

Darn it, I am on the list.  Admiral, what do you recommend????  The Bozo's are organizing...Shall we disrupt their circus???

We were on it.

More importantly, the BozoBorg were also mentioned. They are alive, and it seems that they did not attack the standard Bozos, they are working together.

In the event of an encounter with the BozoBorg, we will engage them. It is likely that they will have preparations for our weapons, so any...creative advice you can offer is much appreciated.

We may also require tactical assistance. The letter said that the BozoBorg were suicide attackers, so they will be very dangerous. Try to keep your distance.

We will not allow Aaron to be captured. Please help us in assuring that.

From: Bozo Intellegence Command
To:    All Bozo Forces

Subj:  Parade

Due to overwelming response to our ticket sales in the region, there wil be a parade.  Battle Tents are to light up the way with massive displays of pyrotechnics...  matter/antimatter bombs followed by our newest explosive, the cotten candy burrito.

The Battle tents are to be followed by our illustrioius BozoBorg suicide squads.  Our Ringlead will follow the squads, then our Destroyer Tents.

Our Main Tent will then come down the street, with our Allies the Arthurians doing areobatic manuveers.  

As we past the Grand Battle stand, great and powerful words from our enlightened leader will be transmitted across all channels.  All Bozo forces are required to listen, failure to listen to our great leader is grounds  for having your mind melted.

LONG LIVE ART BELL

That would be a good time for a stealth attack. Destroy them in front of all their ticket-buyers. That would not only destroy a fleet, it would hurt their high standing in that area. No one would support them anymore.

*A small pod from each of the Arthurian ships is seen gently floating away from the ship. Then in a split second later a laser blast destroys the pods in a gigantic fire ball.*
This is the AI again, the bozos tried to flush me out of the Arthurian matrix but couldn't penetrate my defenses. I destroyed there reactors just to be safe. They can't go anywhere or fire any high power weapons. I am sending you the binaries of the bozo worms. They present no threat as the reproduction code has been omitted. This should help the defenses of the WAN once studied. Oh yes and when they sent the worms to the Arthurians they opened up a link. Because of this I was able to locate the main bozo craft. Coordinates fallow.

I don't know whether to be happy or insluted to not be on that list!  I've caused a major amount of damge to the Bozo Fleet!  But on the other hand, I really don't want them talking about me either!

Mons

From: Bozo Intellegence Command
To:    Second Arthurian Fleet

Subj:  First Arthurian Fleet

It has become apparent that your first fleet has been infected by some kind of computer virus that has rendered them without power.  Per our agreement we are executing your commands in that regard.

*The entire first Arthurian Fleet, blows up*

It has become apparent that the intrusion came across via communications link.  As our communications systems are completely isolated from the rest of the ship.  We have destoyed our communication system to your first fleet.

As per our agreement, we are communicating with you via your representative in our circus.  Of course it will be incernerated as soon as it has finished transmitting to you via hive mind.

We have traced the location of "The BIG Gun" the WAN's have used against us.  It is not, I repeat not located at the location of the WAN III.  We here by suggest that you maintain cloaked status, and search in the general vacinity of your fleet for "The BIG Gun"  Next time it fires, you will b able to concentrate your fire on destoying it.

As per our agreement, if we capture the being known as Mons, we will gladly turn him over to you, for the damage he inflicted on your forces.

We also wish to send messages to our paying customer's, the Venusians, for their support in drawing the WAN fleet within our trap.

We will hatch your next emissary as soon as we have recieved notification that the message is transmitted.

"Ready to fire?"
"Yeah. I've hooked up the generators. Fire when-"
"Collectors."
"Collectors?"
"yeah, didn't you read the instructions?"
"No, I just followed them."
"Typical male."
"Shut up, just fire!"

Sphere's of Chasi begin charging up all along the hull. They swing into position, and unleash their energies upon the bozo forces. One bozo is caught by a single beam, and shudders in that direction, only to be smacked by another beam and violently jerked in the opposite direction.

** OOC NOTE: The following conversation between Termina and Schvundza is in Termina's head only! The other character's don't know what's going on. No being psychic for a few hours and hearing any of the stuff in brackets. **
[Hello, Termina. Having a fun day?]
[Damit, why can't you just die!]
[Ladies first.]
[Touche.]
[Indeed. Have you had a nice life?]
[I don't expect it to end anytime soon.]
[Expect the unexpected, dear girl. You've only had a few trillion years to contemplate and get ready for this moment, havn't you? It always happens to the young ones.]
[You can't kill me. You're behind locked Bozo doors.]
[It was easy to get the Bozo's to let me out once I gave them a few new weapons and promised some more. Oh, I hope you enjoy them. They should be capable of wiping out the galaxy, along with all of you.]
[But... you'll die too!]
[I don't plan on sticking around with the bozo fools! By the time the weapon is activated, I'll be long gone, and constructing my exit out.]
[I... will... kill you.]
[You decieved yourself. You can hate. Just as much as I can. You can hate and kill and bring death and destruction just as I can. We're the same, cracked from the same mold. You know it, and you hate even more because of it.]
[SHUT UP!]

Chasi balls fly from the Draconis in random directions, like wild torpedos. They hit several Bozo cruisers, destroy others. A few strike glancing blows at the WAN III.

"What the LILEH was that!"
"Its... him..."

*The WAN shudders at the blasts hitting it*

*Alarms flash across the boards*


Admiral...We have been hit, damage as follows....

Engines are down!!!!!!

Cloaking device is failing...we are no longer totally invisible...

Power to The BIG GUN is out

Shields are at 80%, but recharging

Battery power is draining quickly

We can not escape through the blackhole...ALL WAN FLeet...commence attack on forward BOZO fleet

ALL Technitions get those engines back online, before the batteries give out, and the cloaking device fails

"Termina! What the SOG are you DOING!" Laugi screams as the Chasi balls continue to fly out in random directions.
"Kill him... must-kill-him... Must-kill him-dead!"

*Incoming transmission*

Hello puny WAN fleet. It is me. Bozania XII Emporer of the Bozo Empire. I am talking to you about surrender with only 1 condition.Surrender the WAN fleet currently present, and I will let you go back to Earth in peace, or I will destory YOU!. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have 1 hour to respond or I will send my ships in a secret location presently, out to destroy you. Don't think about going into the blackhole or you will pay! Just to tell you the BS ABS is a sitting bomb destroy it and you will be destroy.  I shouldn't have said that! I would also like to make a toast to our good friends the Venusians who led you into his death trap. They will be highly rewarded for their actions.Beware don't eat the brownies that Nerd has, hahahahaha!  I did it again. The Arturians have decided to withdraw from this for now but they have told me that if they encounter you they will attack you.The fleet you saw is only a fraction of what it is.You have 59 minutes left.Time flies when you are having fun hahahah! I will enjoy Pete's bar soon. Bozo Intelligence Command, keep me updated.

*screen goes blank*

THANKS FOR NOBODY REPLYING TO OUR POSTS! WE APPRECIATE IT!

WE WILL NOT BE REPLYING TO ANY OF YOUR POSTS ANYMORE. WE ARE FINISHED BEING IGNORED. FAREWELL, FOR NOW.

-Angry Borg

Aaron of Borg,
We have not been ignoring your posts...Please continue to respond.  I tried to respond yesturday, but was attacked by a computer worm last night, and again this morning.  We could use your assistance....Can you evacuate the WAN III from the general area.  We have decided to attempt to capture the BS ABS, and if that fails we will detonate our trap.

Well it looks like time is up. What is your decision?

How's this for a response!?!  You want me?  Here I come!!!!

(Mons turns the ISS BozoBlaster into a collision course with the Bozo Fleet.  All fighters circling around firing at the Main Tent at will!)

You maybe able to wipe me out but not without serious damage to your fleet!

[BozoBlaster to WAN Fleet: Get your butts outta here!  I'll buy enough time for the fleet to back away!  I'm going to try to teleport off the ship into a hidden fighter on the dark side of a moon near by!]

Unless someone has a better plan, I'M GOING IN!  YAHOO!!!!

*special broadcast to Mons (seriously encrypted)*

errr.... Mons, perhaps he will change his views... I am working on it right now... Who knows he will see the error of his ways. I mean, err... if you ram him, err... won't you explode too? At least wait for his response..

*end of transmission*

Peter

Engine Power restored...

Move us through the BlackHole Now....Initiating timer on our trap

ALL WAN SHIPS...ESCAPE THROUGH THE BLACK HOLE NOW

You guys go!  I'll hold them off!!  We can't let them follow you all through the hole.  Move you're butts and I'll see you on the other side!

Pete:  I'm talking about the Bozos!  I have the upmost respect for the Borg.  We never would have gotten as far as we have without them!

errr... so was I... The Bozo Emperor (somethingsomething XII) has a communication in my bar.

I was trying to convince him/her to see the light of logic. No response yet though...

Peter

Oh.  Sorry.  Well, it's too late now!  All the WAN fleet is escaping through the worm hole and I've taken a lot of damage.  There's no turning back now!

Mons
:ESK (http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/armed/ar15.gif ):ESK

*See's the WAN III go into the blackhole.*

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Destroy the cable that connects the WAN III with the ISS Bozo Blaster

*cable destroyed*

It looks like it is just you and me Mons.If you go into the blackhole you will only be seperated from the WAN III 45 billion LYs.HAHAHA! To bad you don't have Rover with you.He knows the past better than any of you.You should have listened to Pete because I respect him but if you want war you will get it.

Fire the BIG Cannon at the ISS Bozo Blaster

*Bozo Blaster hit*

That is your warning.Surrender or be destroyed.

Bozo Intell tells me you have a new secret weapon.

All Bozo forces withdraw with the exception of the BS ABS.

Uncloak my ship!

*Ship five times bigger than the BS ABS shows up*

Here I am Mons. Your weapon doesn't work against my ship. I am different from Chief Bozo Professor Bozinkaf, and so is my ship.

*Screen goes blank*

*The superfast WAN sloop Speedy Gonzolas explodes out of the launch bay with all of the crew of the BozoBlaster, and follows the WAN fleet through the blackhole*

*The timer on the boobytrap explodes*

*The power of 1 million super buritoes explode...The explosion literally pushes the Blackhole back into the galatic center, and fully overflows the amount of matter, to the point a massive eruption of energy explodes away from the blackhole....The energy slams into both the BS ADS and the huge ship of Bozo Emporer Bozania XII...Both explode in a blinding flash as they are converted into pure cosmic energy...The power of all of that cosmic energy warps the wormhole, depositing the WAN Fleet back in there primary home base in ES space...The explosion leaves a beutiful new galaxy....where once the Bozo fleet, and their commanders were

[img src ="http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/image/9702/cartwheel1_hst.jpg[/img]

Well How i got back here is a long story i'll explain it to you all later.  Well Bozo Emperor it is a pleasure finaly meeting you, now get the hell out of here or we will blow u to bits.  Admiral Alantra is armed and ready. ( General Labatt launches all fighters)

"SOGGING LIL-"
Laugi is cut off as the blast hurls the Draconis through space. Termina shudders, screams suddenly, and slumps over silent.
"Termi? Termi? Are you alright? Termi?"

Too bad to bad. I am transmitting this message from the planet Bozo The ship is allright but the BS ABS wasn't because it was a bomb. I got your corrdinates.It looks like you have ended up in Arturian space. My friends will now hunt you down.I am also close to you since you are in Arturian space. I am sending ships out. ETA 24 hours. That was the wrong place to land. I got to attend to official duties right now.

BTW- Bozo Ships have arrived to claim and colonize the new galaxy.Looks like we got more territory to spread the word. i decided to name the galaxy Bozon, which is the name of the Bozo capital planet in the region. I also established the planet of Bozoflux, Bozinkaf, and Bozhul just to name a few. By the time you get back to the new galaxy of of Bozon it will be fully colonized not to mention the Arturians. For their good friendship we gave them another minature galaxy right by there called Arcturus. We also gave one to the Venusians named Venuson.

See ya around the universe.

"Urgh... what happened... where am I?"
The dazed Nerd glances around. He doesn't see himself anywhere, so they must have gone into the black hole. Was He now in the past?
Running down a hall and checking the date on the map, he realizes it was meerly a space hop.
"I guess... the future isn't determined." Nerd walks slowly to the sim room to jack himself into the computer. He had bussiness with a bunch of clowns.

"TERMI! Please, Termi, WAKE UP!" Laugi screamed as he shook the unconscious Termina. Slowly she awoke, faster once she realized the world was moving rather violently.
"Stop! Stop! I'm... alright... are the Chasi collectors still working?"
"I think so. I'll run a diagnostic on them to-"
"No, no time. I need you to jack into the computer. You don't have a jack? @#%$... here, mind-interface with me. Uplink... connect!"
Laugi felt his brain go numb. The raw wealth of information contained in the Draconis was mind boggling! how did Termina handle all of it so skillfully?
He could hear her voice in his head, "Access the pilot controls. I'm tired of this war. I want to kill them, all of them, and I shall. Schvundza must die."
"You... sound... alright. Accessing. Just tell me what to - WHOA!" A sudden surge of knowledge blasted Laugi's mind, causing him to shudder away. Now he knew how to pilot the Draconis with the uptmost skill.
"Now, just do as I tell you when I tell you. Plot a course for the new Galaxy with the Blink drive. Prepare all weapon systems. I'm going to mutate the ship."
"Mutate?"
"You'll see. Just pilot."

*A battered and bruised Dingo reports to the bridge*

Admiral, I regret to report, we have lost the ISS BozoBlaster...We were successful in saving the crew!  I have begun construction of a New Super Assault Carrier, with 10 times the fighter capacity, 20 times the shielding, 15 times the number of major weapons launchers and fully staffed with a division of Anti-Bozo elite forces....We shall name it  the ISS BozoBlaster II.

Our losses from the last battle only delt with ships.  All crew members are accounted for.

Shall we send the new Assault Carrier on a special mission, to join with ISS Alantra, and the Draconia, in capturing the Bozo Emporer.....  The Sector Barrier is up, and the Arthurian forces will not be able to penetrate it...

* A huge 3 headed Dog materializes on the Draconia *

Hi Boss, the Sirius Power Company has completed the reoganization...I am now reporting to you for duty....We have several outstanding power usage from this new Bozo Emporer...  At least our client Art Bell paid the Bozo's power bill.  I have noticed the new galaxy that we are heading to...New customers!!!!!

I still have this old warrent for Dingo's hide, but after seeing what he does with explosives, I am not going to actively pursue him for the moment...too dangerous

Warning! Warning! Arming planetary defense system.

It looks like there is only one way to defete the WANIII

Prepare my ship! We are going to the past. I will destroy you seperatly as young cadets.HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Dingo!  Thanks for the save!  That was a close one.  Sorry about losing the BozoBlaster.  I'll help with the construction of the BozoBlaster II.  

I was talking with Intel and it looks like the Bozos are coming after us.  We need to get to work right away and form somekind of defense plan.  Any ideas?  I'll get down to the weapons bay and get the new carrier ready for flight.

Mons :ESK (http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/armed/ar15.gif ):ESK

##chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....((((in coming message from Spy Command, at a private location)))))))))##CHHHHHHHHHHH........

Sorry Admiral and Dingo that it has taken me forever to report, but I have been undercover on the Bozo ship and I regret to inform that they are planning a counter attack.  Their Bozo's are coming in separate ships that will be unidentified to our radars unless we can bump up our technology quickly..... If they come into our ship space, they can change their identities and walk among us undetected.  I suggest our crew be implanted with a special device that can monitor our crew to see who is who.  The bozos will be able to change their identies to resemble crew members.  Please consider this plan and get back with me.  I will be in the private lab stockpiling these devices to dispersed at your command...

(((((((((OVER AND OUT, Snazee1, Spy Commander)))))))))))))))))))))))))

Since I have not been very active on this mission, I would like to volunteer to be the first to be implanted with Snazee's Recognition Device. In case of failure (an extremely remote possibility, given Snazee's talents, but we can't take chances,) I am more expendable than other crew members.

 Awaiting orders....

Snazee...inoculate all crew members with the Friend or Foe identifcation chip.  Make it geneticly unique keys

New ship policy:  Anyone coming aboard the WAN shall undergo screening and decontamination for Bozoitus upon entry.

All ships entering the area must have armed escort...All escort vehicals shall target escorted vehical's weapons, energy and propulsion systems....At the first hint of trouble, escort vessals shall immediately be disabled....All ships shall be subject to scanning for Bozo technology...if Bozo technology is detected, the vehical, must submit to a full inspection, and any Bozo technology found must be immediately placed into a time status field, until which time the vehical is outside of our sector.  Any vehical that refuses to comply with these policies, is to be concidered suspect....Our allies have been notified, and have made special accomedations to comply...As they are well aware that if the WAN fleet is destoyed, the Bozo forces will be after them next.

We were sucessful in downloading and analysing the Bozo's new technologies...so we are making modifcations to our ships to counter them

We are also aware of the Bozo Emporer's attempts to go into the past to change history...He will run into the same problems, in that he might be present in the past, but he will not be seen, nor will he be able to change anything in the past...The universal laws of Intropy can not be broken...His survaying of the future, he will run into the problem that the future is not set, and the only thing he will see is possiblities of future events

Great fearful leader and ungrand New Bozo Emporer...We request that you hold off the attack until we are able to return.  We were able to load up some of the personnel from our great Assault Battle Tent, but were blow far far far away....We should be back by next week!!!

(http://www2.cybernex.net/~intrtech/Spaceball1/SPACE_RV.gif)






(long live art bell!!)

"Sorry Cerberus, but Nerds on the WAN III. You want to talk to him, he's over there. Sorry. Shall we Moongate you over there?"
"Shut up, Dracone! Concetrate on the flight! Customers my tail, I shall destroy every last Bozo until all but Schvundza are dead! And then I shall kill him! And he shall be dead!"
"Termi... "
"SILENCE! Pilot this ship or I will take you out and do it myself!"
"To think... I used to pilot you..."

Bozo Intelligence: I shall have you courtmartialed! We will attack.Unfortunutly Dingo hasn't been to the future.I have and travel into the past is possible. Beware for the next battle we will have technology far better than anyone has imagined.Don't worry about paradox's we will make plenty of them.HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

BTW- The Arturian fleet is heading for you. Beware.

Snazee- How could you have guessed? I would promote you if you were under my command. I will give you a hint. There is a traitor on your ship.He or she has agreed to work for me for a payment of 1 solar system with  5 planets just like good ol' Earth.He or she has been sabataging your He or she is human. What a deal! We are also collecting information on the new Bozo Blaster so we can upgrade our ships to destroy it with ease.They are on the top of the WAN III crew with access to the bridge.A good friend of mine now.

"Alright, we've arrived around the first Bozo planet in this new galaxy. Now what?"
"Watch and learn, Dracone."

Chasi sphere's charge up all along the hull of the Draconis. the fly around the hull, collascing into one huge ball aiming at the Bozo planet below. It fires, space-time rippling in its wake. The ball hits the atmosphere, blasting much of it away, causing everything on the side of entrance to die within minutes. But they do not have that long, as the ball strikes into the surface with the force of a nova, and shatters the planet into a billion flamming fragments.

"They... will... die..."
"Moving to next planet! BLINK!"

YOU MURDERER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks to you Mars has been destroyed from the past.All it's inhabitants destroyed.Someone should disapear soon because their Grandma and Grandpa are on that planet.TOO BAD! I will rather not tell you. In a few minutes Earth will.Don't worry about going back to Earth to save humanity. It will take too much time. Wait! Earth is where all Bozo's come from. I will just infect Earth will Bozotis. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Bring us into LEO!HAHA!!!

Anymore Bozo colonies destroyed will result in me destroying colonies for the past with some of your parents in them which will result in you never living.In that case the first on to go is Nerd and his multiple personallities.

How about this.

I don't infect Earth. We will have peace. I will not take further action against Nerd if we wdo this because I have already had my vengeance.

Here is the Peace Treaty:

 -I declare that Bozo,Arturian, and Venusian colonies in the new galaxies are the territory of hte Bozo's,Arturian's, and Venusian's.

 -I declare that embassy's and ambassador's be sent to Earth by the Bozo's and to Bozo by the Humans.

 -I declare that no human or Bozo war vessles will from hear on not enter each others territory unless authorized by authority's.

 -I declare that any military action against each other's colonies from now on is an act of war.

 -I declare that science and exploration vessels may be allowed into each others territory following inspection.

 -I declare that failure of meeting these ship requirments will allow the territory's leaders to destroy the ship legally.

Any other suggestions.If you decide to go ahead with peace tell me the date in which you would like to meet on the Venusian planet Venusian. The Venusian's and Arturians have decided to sign the treaty if you will.

-I declare that by signing this treaty, the war between the Bozo's Arturians, Venusian's against the Humans will end.

"GIVE ME SCHVUNDZA! GIVE HIM TO ME!"
"Sogging... lileh..."

The Chasi sphere's on the sides of the hull darken into a sickly black, like the dark Chasi Schvundza wielded while he was free.

"GIVE HIM TO ME OR YOU AND ALL OF YOUR FOOLISH KIND WILL DIE!"

Meanwhile, on the WAN III:
"Don't sign the treaty! The bozo's obviously only understand their demented concepts of time. It all makes sense now, give me some time to explain, and you will see how it is impossible for the Bozo's to infect old earth with Bozitis!" Nerd screams, the data-jack burning hot into his brain.

Those terms are acceptable, but we also have our own...

1.  That if a attack takes place to any of our ships, or of our allies, the Borgs, the Draconians, or others in our allience..By a force of unknown's that instead of an instigation of an immediate war, which is not profitable by either of our sections of space, that a join investigation be done first.

2.  The use of galaxy destroying weapons not be deployed by either side.  The use of tactical weapons like the "rito" and the "Cotton Candy pie" are allowed.

3.  The use of time travel to change the past is an involital situation....the time lords have deemed that power as too dangerous for anyine, and they will destoy any race that attempts to change history.

4. Incursions by exploration vehicals will be allowed, and they may be armed, but a representitive of the other's government shall be allowed to partake in exploritory missions.  If the representitive of the government declairs an area offlimits to exploration...then the other side must respect those area's, and understands that entery of off limits area's is at one's own risk, and if a ship is destroyed, it will not be an act of war.  In otherwords you enter our weapons testing area, and your ship is blown up, oh well, that is life.

Only when we have a signed treaty, will we show you where our new weapons testing exclusion zone is located

I DON'T HAVE SCHVUNDZA!

He helped me then he left.I have no clue where he went! If you want my guess he is in Arturian space. I would gladly help you find him if you sign the treaty.

I am not taking advantage of you. I am different from Bozania XI and Bozinkaf! I am doing this to stop this nonsense.Yeah a bozo having logic and the logical person going bozo ! I have no plans of infecting Earth unless the treaty isn't signed.then I will go back to my planet and have a good life.Maybe I will teach logic but then again I have to wait till Bozinkaf dies.

[Foolish child, you'll never find and kill me.]
[I will hunt you down to the ends of the Universe to kill you.]
[You'll die first, just like the rest when I have to leave.]
[I'll follow you through.]
[You can't. You don't know-]
[I have the dark Chasi too, fool.]
[Impossible.]
[I'll prove it to you when we meet.]

Meanwhile, on the WAN III:
Not that it amounts to anything, since no one is listening to him anyway, Nerd begins explaining his own crazy ideas about time travel.
"The time travel that the bozos and the WANians used through the wormhole wasn't true time travel. They weren't going back along the world lines, erasing the future as they went. They meerly jumped into a timeline from the past, making it impossible to change the future of our Universe.
"Schvundza, in his bid for Universal destruction, would attempt to erase all the world lines, present and past, so that the Universe in all cases would cease to exist. That's what he hoped to gain, the energy of all the world lines ever created in a Universe. Had he been successful, he would've gotten a huge power boost.
"Now, the Bozo's can't actually change anything in our Universe, so its safe to say that if the infect the other Universe with Bozitis, then it would have little to no effect on us.
"My idea is that instead of having a complex arrangement of treaties between the WAN and the Bozo Empire, we should send ALL the Bozo's into that Universe, destroy the bridge to that world line, ie the black hole, and set that world line free from our world line. Boom, we have two Universes, one with Bozo's, one without.
"I suggest, however, that Schvundza be left with the care of the WAN fleet. He may eventually overpower the Bozo's from absorbing their experiments in free energy, destroy their Universe, absorb all its world lines, and come at us with more energy than ever. If we keep him here, he could be drugged constantly, and under constant supervision."

**OOC Note: Termina is the one screaming for Schvundza, Nerd is the one explaining it all, and Laugi is caught in between, simply wishing he was back in a bar somewhere. **

Dingo:

I accept your conditions. May I ad that time travel may be done for scientific purposes.When alll our nations sign the treaty we will show you our weapons testing area. Our markets will be open for trade as soon as signed.For this I need your Admiral's signature and her officers since it is a democracy on Earth.I just need to sign my name. I have dropped out of time warp and I am on a coarse to Venusian.I hope to see you there.

Nerd:

Bozo forces have raided SCHVUNDZA. I have him in custody. I will make a trade to you. I will hand over SCHVUNDZA if you give me Nerd's ally who plans to destroy me. This will leave the authorities that have recieved them able to charge them with anything. Otherwise I will keep him and sign the treaty.

How about this.We make the trade as long as the WAN III doesn't use him to boost their military.This will allow Bozo Arturian and Venusian investigators aboard the ship.

Dingo I strongly urge you to reconsider this treaty, given the Bozo's past, this is yet another ploy

I have set up a panel in the lab for every crew member to come and get identification. (swallowing a small metal square the size of a pea and tastes like chocolate). Please encourage all crew to get this done before we do any time travel.

As for you Bozo Emporer, I wouldn't serve on your ship if it were the last in the entire universe.  Make no mistake about it, we WILL win this war against all Bozo's!!!

Snazee,
I am only negotiating the treaty...I do not have the authority to sign it.

Nerd57, Snazee, Mons - e-mail me for treaty conciderations...once you know them, you will see that the treaty might be a good idea.  (dingo1@space.com)

Oh WEAK and POWERLESS Bozo Emporer....threaten to COURTMARSHALL me....You have massive problems on your hands now....WE the BOZO's have had it with your patheticness...first you get US into a WAR with the WAN violating our first treaty, that was very advantagious to us...Then you take that "SPACE GOD" out of statis, and with it's power you overthrew our Great and Glorious True Emporer ART BELL....you who were a broom pusher behind the elephants...
You who have negotiated a new treaty, that has a most disadvantaged flaw in it for us glorious BOZO's

WE have FREED Our True EMPORER ART BELL!!!! from the place you had him imprisioned.

WE have captured your pathetic "SPACE GOD" and have imprisioned it into a time statis in another universe...

YOU and your pathetic allies the Arthurians will now deal with us...The TRUE BOZO's!!!

LONG LIVE ART BELL

Orders to our spy on the WAN III...Present yourself to the Admiral PLC, and come home...our glorious EMPORER ART BELL so commands!!!!

LONG LIVE ART BELL

Looks like the Bozo's have a civil war on their hands.

Bozo Emporer... I will present it all to the Admiral for concideration.

Bozinkaf has captured Art Bell for me! He will be sent to the gallows today.Don't think about finding him.We will kill him in the past since we haven't signed the treaty yet.I have sent Bozo Informer home and he is a few minutes away from capturing you.What you are doing is punishable by death. Art Bell is the center of nonlogicness. I overthrew him because of his failures.He overthrew Bozania XI and I will soon have my revenge. I have told Bozo Informer that once you are captured he will take your place at the seat of intelligence. I wish I could get WAN help on this, but I also wish they would know what I am doing. I can't say it in direct form or Bozinkaf will take the crown but the keyword is logic.


BTW- Most Bozo's agree with this new peace deal and they also agree with me as Emporer. You are facing many people. The Bozo Assualt Army Division is on its way to get you if Informer fails.You have no where to run

SHORT LIVE ART BELL !

Art Bell was the one that put us Bozo's in the 21st century.It is the 24th now. Old logic must die and be put in the stupid idea section.

Your lowly toadness.... to inform you of our agent within your court it is  Bozinkaf!!!!!!!  Yes he has captured our Great and most knowledgeable leader EMPORER ART BELL...but from you!!!!

Our location is mobile, and the great BOZO NAVY is on our side...How are you going to move your forces, when we control all of the ships!!!!

We demand the return to the old treaty you foolishness...And your WORDS of BLASTOMY have been transmitted to the masses, and they side with US

Yes we live in the 24th century....Our ancient and holy text's have lead us forward to this point...they shall not be desicrated, you most underserving WORM

We have gone back into the past, and have undone the damaged you have caused, before the waves of time distilation smashed into the presence.

YOU who have tried to undo all we have won in the past, you who are NOT BOZO and follow the unholy rules of logic...We call upon all of the masses to support us in our JeHAD against you pathetic sea slime

LONG LIVE ART BELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I ask for your assistence in hunting down Bozo Intelligence, Art Bell, and Bozinkaf. They are the ones that have caused the ordeal between our two great nations.Knowledge will WIN BOZO INTELLIGENCE!!!!!!!!!!!! How could I have set you back that far.I have only been in this chair for a year.The WAN and Bozo's have been fighting before that. It is Bozinkaf Art Bell and his henchman that have done this to this Empire of Bozo's.

BOZO SPACE FORCE!!! ATTACK!

My god!

I am in true horror! Planets vaporised, past en future altered...

Every victory has its price, and sometimes, the price is just to high! Bozos need to be educated, not erradicated! I will go in exile to my bar for the next 14 days. We have a fine docter, so I won't be missed...

*throws docter/Wan insignia on the central desk on the bridge*

What good is a WAN principle if we only destroy, and not enlighten? And you, bozo intelligence command, who are you planning to command if they are all dead. And my dear Bozo Emperor, who are you going to rule, when all your subjects are mere consequenses of alterations of the past? Have your previous 11 emperors done this? no...

Peter :x (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/sick.gif ):x


praying for your mercy don't say you see the light
what diffrence does it make if the good lord's right
at the end of the war the survivors are none
b'cos a war is a loss a war can't be won
you're just another soldier and you're doing the dying
you're a symbol of a nation so boy stop crying
hero of a war such a man so brave
a medal's worth nothing when you're lying in your grave

Bozo Emporer....Are you asking us the WAN to violate prior treaties with the Bozo's to enter their space and engage with Bozo forces????

I can not authorized this action.  For this is an internal affair of Bozo Space.  

To All WAN forces....  Our borders with the Bozo Space are hereby closed.  Any Bozo who crosses the border shall be detained and sent to a refugee internment camp pending the resolution of the Bozo's internal striff.  Upon the settlement of that conflict, all Bozo refugee's shall be repatriated to Bozo space, with the exception of those Bozo's who request to stay within WAN space, and follow the rules and laws of the WAN territory.

Any Bozo War Tent shall be concidered hostile, unless they request permission to enter our space

Dingo, I sent you an e-mail about the treaties

A war between Bozo's, now that's funny!! Who would be the winner?????

The new ISS BozoBlaster II is almost finished.  However, due to the boarder closeing, I've decided to take her out and finish her while patrolling.  All fighters are making long sweaps of remote areas of WAN Space.  Nothing is getting in here without us seeing it.  You can count on it!  
Mons out.

(Mons flicks a switch to shut off the radio but the radio remians transmitting...

Okay, where the heck did I put that second case of rum and my stoggies?  Where, where, where, Oh here it is!  Nothing like patrolling space with a rum buzz and a good cigar!

Mons :ESK (http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/armed/ar15.gif ):ESK  

Ex-Bozo Emporer.... The Bozo Army has agreed to join us....We have the Army, the Navy, and the populas with us!!!

It was YOU who instigated the last WAR with the WAN...We have had a trial in your honor....Our Great Emporer ART BELL, presided over the case....  We apointed the top lawyer in Bozo space to be your represenitive...The Honorable Senior Judge Kangaroo.....Our senior representative from the injustice division The Dishonorable Commander Court...oversaw the prosecution....

You were found GUILTY of the following charges...
For Attempted Coup - 1 day time served
For Starting a WAR with the WAN - 1 hour of serving soda's to circus guests
For Attempting to go back in the past and altering history, thus setting back the Bozo effort - life imprisionment in the halls of illogic
For Attempting to intoduce non Bozo logic to the masses - Permanant Banishment from Bozo Space, striped of all rank and privledges, striped of all material assets.  Striped of your white face paint, and red nose.  Your red hair is to be shaved off, and you must turn in your clown costume.  Your name is to be promiantly displayed in the hall of shame.

LONG LIVE ART BELL

Order to the forces loyal to our great leader ART BELL....Locate and capture of Ex-BOZO EMPORER...and throw him out of our Space!!!!

Disregard any and all whining from his Ex-excellence

All education forces....redouble your efforts to passing the wisdom of our history and knowledge

So I take it the civil war is over???????

Dingo, reporting that all most all crew members are identified, still need SkyJim, PLC, and Yales to come and get IDed!! If you hear from them, send them my way!!

Mons, if you need any help, just let me know!  I love to fly!!

Roger that...Snazee...I do not think the Bozo Civil War is over...I suspect that we have just seen the opening shots...I expect it to get ugly.  I think we should maintain our guard, and set up refugee camps along the border.  The Bozo Emporer looks like has been deposed for now, but from our intellegence assets within the Bozospace have reported that the military over there has fractured about down the middle.  The population there seems to be stanchly behind Art Bell, but the Bozo Emporer has a staunch following with the Arthurians, and the Venusians.
I suspect that we should strengthen our military assets, and defensive capibilities.  As is our policy not to interfere in the affairs of other races, we will strive to not get drawn into it on either side.  Our allies might have other idea's, but that is their desision to make.  I understand that it might be precieved that we are taking an isolationist approch to the situation, even though we are not.  We do maintain the treaty we negotiated way back.

"Tee hee, you will all-"
Termina slumps against the ground. Laugi throws the metalic pole to the ground and hovers over her. He stared at her oddities, her claws, her tail, a human body. It didn't make sense why this should happen, it really didn't.
He diverted his gaze towards the main screen. The chared and shattered remains of a planet and its moons. Laugi was the accomplice in murder. The murder of a billion people. Bozo, but still, sentient beings.
What would happen if he killed her? What horrible consequence was keeping Laugi from reaching over and snapping Termina's neck? Tossing her out the airlock and leaving, going back to Nerd and the trade route until the Bozo's decided he was too dangerous, even if he was only an accomplice. And what if they took it out on the rest of the Dracones if they couldn't find him?
And if they did find him? Would the torture him? Kill him? Send into a stasis field to sleep next to Schvundza, Universe murderer of a trillion years and a quadrillion lives?
Why couldn't he kill her?
"WAN," Laugi spoke slowly into the communicator, "This is the Draconis, flagship of the Lagian Rogue Fleet. We now ask for safe passage out of the galaxy. Any attacks brought upon our ship will result in the destruction of an inhabitated star system. Tell Nerd I will miss him. Lau... Draconis out."

Negative Laugi, bring the Draconia back here, we will place you both in time stasis...until which time we can cure you both of the overwelming influences of the "Space God".  It was he using your bodies to destroy that planet...Not the two of you.
If you both are out of stasis, what is to prevent him from taking both of you over again, and destroying more planets???  The conditioning he has put you both in, prevents you both from self-destructing.
We feel your remorse, for we too feel the pain of the losses of life (even though they are Bozo's).  War is too costly.

Yes I give you full permission to fly into Bozo space to violate the treaty anbd to destroy the coup.

Bozo Intell:

YOU STARTED THE COUP BY OVERTHROWING BOZANIA XI.YOU KILLED HIM!!!

I have space force on my side. who cares about the army and navy when there is only one wway off the planet. Peter is right as always but I don't follow the rules of war when there is a coup. If I am forced to I will go back in time and destroy Art Bell and worse if something else happens. You have been charged as follows:

2 coup attemps : Death Penalty
Questioning a decision by an high ranking officer: 1 year hard labor
For starting Bozo inlogicness: 1 year in logic hall

We have the Arturians on our side.Give up! You can't get off Bozo so you wont win. You take over the planet. I destroy it.

Again Peter is right.I shouldn't go back in time but I will if things get bad.I hope WAN doesn't sit back and watch us kill ourselves or that is the start of Bozotis. Dingo, if the Admiral is on leave you have authority to make the decision.With this message I am sending you credits for the ISS Bozo Blaster damage and all other damage I caused you earlier. I would still like to sign the treaty but we must add that it is the duty of a leader to decide who can come in there space with military vessels. I am still in control of my Empire.It is too bad because Bozo Intell is wrong. I still have army batallions and navy ships left.The only thing I control whole is the space force (they thank me for their bigger quarters and new technology and they are very loyal).

If U want it that way then we will fight and u will loose.

Hi I have been on leave for awhile. I have read these posts and I think it would be a good idea to fight with the Bozo Emporer against Art Bell and his coup.As I see it Bozania is trying to get some logic into the bozo's and Art Bell is doing the opposite.We can be sure of that because they have Bozinkak on their side.

What should I do for hte time being.Shall I take the helm and have some target practice or go help Mons with the New BB.

BTW- Peter is right.So is Bozania.We should just watch them die. It is wrong. It is genicide.

"I'm not comming back. There is no way I will stay in time stasis, and I will not come back. Schvundza may be powerful, but he can't be powerful enough to take control of other sentient beings. He can exploit them, as he did with the Bozos and almost did with the Borg. We are leaving. Tell Nerd that he'll have to buy a new ship."

Meanwhile on the WAN III:
"BUY a NEW ship?! Are you crazy! That ship costs too much! Why I-" and he continues on and on and on.

Back on the Draconis, Laugi is tying Termina to the console.
"I tried to get your support in our leave, but I will leave, with or without your help. Goodbye, Dingo. May your endeavors be proserous."

It looks like I am favored amoung bozo's to win this war. The count is 60% for me 40% for Art Bell. Propoganda pays off.This is not bad I am just telling the people the truth.Art Bell has started a draft while I look for volunteer's. Most people volunteer because they want to get rid of the coup government of Art Bell and Bozinkaf.

Laugo, and Termina,  Arguing the points with you about leaving is not going to convince you to change your mind.  Only time will.  We have no choise but to wish you the best of luck in your endever.

Nerd57, since you are in need of a new ship, we will help you with building a new one.

Bozo Emporer....  We can not interfere with your civil war....  We will glady mediate things between you and Art Bell, if you both so request.  We will be willing to sign a non agression treaty with your side...under the same terms as already agreed to.

Bozo Intellegence Command....We offer the same deal with you, and Art Bell, as well as maintaining our first treaty.

Both sides of the Bozo Civil WAr.....We will not tolorate the time travel....If we have to we will interfere in that aspect.  We have contacted the Time Lords, and they will monitor your activities, and take what steps as nessisary to prevent any attempt at modifying time.

Mons, when you have the ISS BozoBlaster II ready, let me know.

Rover...new assignment...you will be in charge of setting up Bozo refugee centers, and border patrols.

Labatt...if you can hear me, keep us informed of your status.

Your uglyness, Ex-Bozo Emporer...Thinking you have all of the Space fleet under your command....You have no fleet anymore!!!
*Sends override signals to all Bozo Space fleets....causing all of there engine cores to melt down, and rendering the engine rooms completely unihabital*  Lets see you move your pathetic War ships now!!!!

We one the otherhand do have WAR SHIPS, and our allies the Bozo-Borgs!!!  They were great assistance to our intellegence capibility, and we were able to free them from their miserable existance in the Borg collective....They have embraced our philosiphy

Dingo of the WAN, we had you in our power once before, and we will maintain our treaty with you, but we will not sign a new one.  We disagree on the true logic, but we do have honor.

We will be willing to negotiate a settlement between us The keepers of the true fair and the miserable and without any honor Ex-Bozo Emporer.  Polls indicate that we the disiples of ART BELL hold the majority of the populos...Do not believe or trust the slimeone, and unholy blastphamer of the true faith to it's word...We trusted him once, and he unsurped our great EMPORER ART BELL.  Our great EMPORER ART BELL word is good....we did prove that...this miserable mockery's word is no good


LOBG LIVE THE TRUE EMPORER ART BELL

<Your uglyness, Ex-Bozo Emporer...Thinking you have all of the Space fleet under your command....You have no fleet anymore!!!
*Sends override signals to all Bozo Space fleets....causing all of there engine cores to melt down, and rendering the engine rooms completely unihabital* Lets see you move your pathetic War ships now!!!>

Forgot to tell you about the modifications.Now I am glad I didn't.There is no overwrite system anymore. Only the captain of the ship can blow it up. Our ships our safe and they are destroying the army.At my guess there will be no more Bozo's in a day.

We one the otherhand do have WAR SHIPS, and our allies the Bozo-Borgs!!! They were great assistance to our intellegence capibility, and we were able to free them from their miserable existance in the Borg collective....They have embraced our philosiphy

Aaronofborg: You want to destroy some enemy borg and have fun while doing something useful. You may come with me and destroy those fools.

Dingo of the WAN, we had you in our power once before, and we will maintain our treaty with you, but we will not sign a new one. We disagree on the true logic, but we do have honor.

Dingo: You see! These people don't care for logic.They care for power and stupidity. PLEASE HELP US!!!! YOU ARE JUST WATCHING MY PEOPLE DIE RIGHT NOW!PLEASE HELP!

We will be willing to negotiate a settlement between us The keepers of the true fair and the miserable and without any honor Ex-Bozo Emporer. Polls indicate that we the disiples of ART BELL hold the majority of the populos...Do not believe or trust the slimeone, and unholy blastphamer of the true faith to it's word...We trusted him once, and he unsurped our great EMPORER ART BELL. Our great EMPORER ART BELL word is good....we did prove that...this miserable mockery's word is no good


Sure....what poll did you get that from. Art bell's fan club? You will be destroyed.We have more allies than you. You have Art Bell. I am the real blood emporer.Art Bell is just some crazed bozo who got drunk and killed my father.


WAIT!!............ I have just learned that all the bozo's loyal to me have left for refugee camps.IT IS TIME!!! Time to push the big red button!


BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There goes the planet with my enemy's on it too. Don't try to make believe you got off the planet because my ships are the only thing that can get off it. All of my ships are with me and accounted for.No defectors! lifesigns one the planet are 0.You may live BIC but Art Bell is gone.Bozo Informer was with him his last minutes.He told me right before the Boom that he is just reading.No that was the real Art Bell not some make believe decoy.Think of anyway he could have lived and I will laugh.

Dingo, I will away from the lab for a bit, been assigned a secret mission, will report when I get back.  If while I'm gone anyone needs the identification chips, you know where they are at, so just let yourself into the lab.  

I will report any information as I get it!!!

Over and out, Snazee1, Spy Commander

I know where you are going. You are going into Bozo space. This is a violation of an old treaty (which has not been dumped). I hope you are spying for the good of the Bozo's because I can no longer tollerate for the bad of us.

*Massive laughter erupts in BOZANIA XII ear...He turns his head. and stares down the barrel of a huge gun*  You insane and genisideal maniac...How dare you destroy our homeworld!!!

*BOZANIA XII is quickly striped, scanned, and he is tested...all the time shaking in rage.  The scanners, and tests complete their work.  The report states that this is truely BOZANIA XII*

Yes, we have verified that it is truely you.....You who killed our Official Art Bell......It will be weeks before his holiness new body is ready, and we can download his mind back.  There has always been, and always will be one Great Emporer ART BELL.

*The scanners kick out another report.  It is read and shock is registered on BIC's have......The report states that this is truely BOZANIA XI*

We killed you.....calling up the previous tape of the execution of BOZANIA XI...watching carefully, BIC notices that the date/time stamp is changed 1/2 way through the recording...It is you!!!  How you managed to escape your execution we do not know, but we will find out!!!

You will not escape us this time, but because of your popularity, we will not execute you immediately, but instead make you a figurehead for the masses, until which time our holiness Emporer ART BELL has been fully restored.

You should know your fate!!!!  

*A large box is wheeled in.  BOZANIA XII is placed inside of it.  It is sealed, from a speaker inside of the box*

BOZANIA XII...You are now inside of a holographic chamber.  You will be alive and well.  This chamber can not be timeshifted without destroying the occupent...To you it will seem like all of your actions are carried out...Like all of your orders are followed.  Your words will be screened for hidden messages and possible orders to your followers, but the orders they will recieve, will not be yours, but ours instead.  We are going to stand down the fleets, we are going to rebuild our homeworld....we are going to put a stop to this WAR you are so keen about.....We want PEACE...we can not spread the good word on our knowledge in a WARTIME situation...the populus is too scared of it.  They just want quiet simple lives....

This box you now will live the rest of your life in will NOT be kept here in Bozospace.  But instead you are being relocated to a destination even unknown to us.  We have contacted WAN HQ...even though they are our enemy, even they can see that your contiuned presence is a threat to them as well as us.  They have dispatched an Agent, to take you in your permanant prision far away....You will not be alone in your travels.  They also will be taking the "time frozen"
SCHVUNDZA as well

*In steps the WAN agent....it is....Snazee*

WAN agent, here are your prisioners.  Please kindly inform your Admiral that BozoSpace will be closed to all ship traffic until which time we have repaired all of the damage he has inflicted

Yes I am Bozania XI! Every well educated historian would know that I didn't have a son. This is the reason I am trying to kill you because it was your coup that tried to kill me.

So what? I blew up the planet.The planet full of Art Bell supporters.

*beams back to ship in box*

Set a coarse for the WAN III! We are defecting.I will notify all my supporters to come with me and I will set up the Bozon (not bozo) Empire inside the Bozon galaxy, far away from Art Bell. As part of my defecting I will give all classified Bozo information to the WAN III with this message, so they can destroy them later.My new Empire will revolve around logic. I will make a promise to the people that once I die they have the power to set up a republic with an emporer at the top with the power to veto laws made by the senate. I surrender all of Bozo space( the Bozon galaxy isn't in Bozo space) to Art Bell.

But before I do that I have to wait a minute..............Bozo Informer has successfully assasinated Bozinkaf, his body was burned.

Art Bell will live again but he won't be the same as he used to.He will be pushed up 50 years of age. He will act old but not look like it.

I better go.

WARP IN 321!

*Bozania's ship goes out of Bozo space heading for the Bozon sector.

I will return someday!!!!!!!!!!!!



<This message is directed towards the WAN III with alll the classified information>

*Private, unmonitored link to BIC..... We will transport the box to an undisclosed location....We will notify you when that mission is complete*

*Private unmonitored communication to Bozania XI....We have plotted a course for you and your followers to a central location for transferance to an Inter-Galatic starliner for your long journey to a galaxy far far away, where you can live in peace.....due to the great distances involved, this will be a one way trip, until you can develop the technology to create the exotic fuel needed.....we have recieved your transferance of technical data about the Bozo's*

*Private unmonitored transmission to Snazee - geez, I hope this works, we did not need that civil war to get out of hand.....it was a great idea to take the disagreements with in the Bozo goverenment, and cause it to shatter into two easier to deal with factions.....A special Order of the WAN has been submitted to HQ, for placement within your jacket...of course this is super top secrut, and can never be publicly acknowldeged*

*Private unmonitored communicade to Laugi, and Termina - the captured Schruvda is being shipped to you via very high speed courior for your personal disposition of him....we hope that you will eventually return*

ALL WAN forces....you can stand down from general quarters.  Maintain Yellow alert, lets finally let things settle down for a while.  Normal shore leave, and vacations are hearby restored....The BAR is open, drinks are on my personal account

Ummm Bozz, if you need a new ship...I have a very powerful, and extreamly fast ship......With lots of cargo space available....It is yours, for you do own the Power company

I will go to the place you want me and my followers to go. Can you get me a galaxy M-class please. I don't wan't the horrible regime of Art Bell to get the Bozon galaxy.

I officially give the Bozon galaxy to the WAN III in return for 25 ships to transport all my people in that galaxy.I hope you have enough. If not you can build them.It is a small some to pay compared to the galaxy. the ships need to big transports.

WAIT.......... The Artuians want to come live inj the galaxy too.They said their space is the property of the WAN III if they give us the required ships needed for the journey.We will divide the galaxy if not merge as one. If we do merge you may call us the Arcturians.

We are back.

We have been reading the logs of the past few days, and they almost put the entire collective to sleep. We still maintain our viewpoint of a few days ago. We grow tired of this sector. We will most likely be leaving soon.

..........i read you loud and clear.....Mission complete.... will be returning ASAP.....Please meet me in the lab for a complete briefing......No let's make that meeting in the bar....I'm parched for some beverages....@#%$ Bozo ship was  dry ship, no booze aboard......Over and out.....Snazee1

Welcome back AOB...we have missed your insite and wisdom...We understand if you decide to go elsewhere, for the Borg are a vast race, and have many projects to pursue.

Snazee, what would you expect from Bozo's but dry ships!!

Bozania XI...We have arranged for the transportation of all of your peoples to your new galaxy..There are many M-class planets abound there from our observations

I can't thank you enough. The Arturians and my followers have decided to merge into the Arcturians.

Let's set a coarse for the Arcturian Galaxy....\

WARP IN 3..........2............1................

*Shoots of into the vastness of space*

You are the only one.

"Make sure he's high. We'll be dropping comunication when we recieve him. If we do ever return, we promise it will be with the severed head of Schvundza."

Meanwhile, on the WAN III:
"Borg, I'm interested in opening full trading options with your race. If you are interested please press one, if not please press two.
"Cerberus, sounds good, but I'm afraid I only use Dracone ships. The blink drive is simply so time and energy saving that I can't live without it.
"Dingo, I'm rerouting my neuronics so that I can download information information, much like Termina. Hopefully this will bring me somewhere within her capabilites as far as piloting and space fighting. I hope this becomes a valuable asset to the WAN.
"Peter the bartender, I've begun assembling a book of all my wisdom, specially for the Bozos. Fear not, they will be educated. I'm also working on a new Chasi weapon. If my understanding of the weapon is correct, then I may have a logic beam weapon. They will not go uninformed for long.
"Anyway, I bid you ado Laugi. You have been a most valuable friend. If now is the last time we converse, then at least allow me to say this:
"I LOVE YOU, MAN!"

Press one what? What do you propose trading? Any colonies we can assimilate?

Well since our mission is over we might as well do something.Since we are very far out in space let's go do some exploring. The is a rumor around these parts that is the galaxy Numeron there is a planet that there is a planet called Aron which has the best liquor on this side of the Beta sector. Peter is running out of the good stuff and a sober crew is a bad crew so how about we go there and stock up. Who knows what we will find? It is only a rumor.

If we set a coarse the Numeron galaxy is about 2-3 days away at Warp 60. Want to break a record? Us fighter pilots sure do.

Rover out...

AOB... With Nerd57, he should know of planets and races who are in need of assimulation.  

Nerd57...lets persue trade with the Borg...and maybe we should also look to open up new trade missions, with Rover leading exploration efforts

Rover, start work on a speed ship.....But when you go exploring, do so covertly.  The WAN does not want to get involved with another battle for a while...Many of the crew are in need of shore leave...myself included

The boat leaves at 1900. We are going to have some good trading over at Aron.

ISS BozoBlaster II is finished.  I'll pull her to rejoin the fleet and leave motion and tacion sensors in place around our boarders.  Also, I've made a flight schedule for 6 fighters at a time to patrol our space.  I'm bring the B.B. back into the hanger.  I needed to get her into space so quickly, There are no supplies on board!  Can't go out without rum, I mean food!

AOB.  I do hope you decide to stay with us.  However, if you with to leave, please know that you'll always have a home here.  Also, if you would, I've had some troubles with the new shield generator on the ISS BozoBlaster II.  I've got it docked in the Weapons Bay.  Could you help me figure out what I'm doing wrong?  I'd really appreciate it!  Thanks!

Mons :ESK (http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/armed/ar15.gif ):ESK

Dingo, I am requesting some R&R, I will be hibernating in my office for at least a day or so, then I might be in the lounge.  If my presence is needed, just page me overhead!!!
Thanks

R&R granted

I have just finished going over the data we hacked from the Arturians with the AI. Turns out they have some goodies we can use. First off the have very good shielding technology we can use it to complement out capital ships. Next I found a way to cut the fuel use on the phoenixes in half. And the coolest device would have to be the rail guns. They will propel a 25 kilo nickel slug at 55% of c. If a direct hit were scored the kinetic energy released on the ships hull would be close to a 50 megaton nuke. I don't think we have a ship big enough to carry one of there rail guns but if the Arturians had them someone else might. We might want to run studys on how to counter this weapon.

"Schvundza recieved. Laugi... out."
All signs of the Draconis dissappear. All that's left is a little shimmer of energy, and a slight depression in space-time.

"Borg, while it is in my best interests to help you and keep you alive, it is not in my best interests to lose customers. I'm afraid assimilation would do that. Although... Hmmm..." Nerd tap tap taps on the virtual keyboard in his brain. "Here's a list of races that don't trade with me, along with their coordinates. Have fun!
"Rover, I'm heading to the bay now. When we get there, I'll make sure to stop by the planet you speak of and pick up as many drinks as I can hold. I'll be the wettest ship in this Universe.
"Message to Draconian League. I'm so happy with your last two ships, I've decided to buy another! Transaction will be complete when the ship reaches the Mynian star, planet 4, classification Mars. See you all soon.
"Mons, upload the 'prints to the net, I'll see if I can find a race capable of such a feat as building a gigantic rail gun ship. I'm sure I've seen something like it before, although it could've simply been a really freaking big hotel.
"Dingo, I don't need a shore leave. I've been out of it long enough, I'm going to make up for my absences. If you need anything, drinks, advice, or even someone to sit in while you take a breather, my id is listed below."

NERD57: ID NUMBER: 425715

Double checking the rail gun scmatics....Hmmmm, if we cut down the speed to 40 c.........Yep we can do it....Mons prepare the ISS Bozoblaster for a new weapon.....we can fit 4 modified rails guns on the hull....Be perfect weapons for planetary bombardment, and primarily space stations...Something we could calculate positions.  Against capital ships, different story, unless it were point blank.

Lets go ahead and prepare for shield enhancement....After you do a RIM run with Rover and Nerd

*walks into the flight bay 3*

Who put this ship here?

*look's at card*

To Rover
From Bozo Emporer Bozania XI

Those Bozo's put one heck of a ship together.

LET"S GO

*looks at panel*

WARP 60!!!!!!

I'm breaking da record I'm breaking da record!

I will call the ship the Delta Wing.

Has a good touch aye Nerd?

*Delta Wing lifts off the ground*

*Smashes into bay door*

@#$%!!!! Where is the garage door opener!

Here we go

*fly's out of ship*








WARP 50      51       5 2       53     54        56               56                       57                  
            58                                                                                                         59
       

                      60!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH YEAH OH YEAH!!!!

Now where do ya want to go Nerd?

"Hmmm," Nerd says, peering into the ceiling of the craft, if you can actually have a ceiling in space. "Lets head to that Liquor planet, pick some up, and sell it off to the bartender. And was that question a crack at my being like Bill Gates?"

Nerd: Perhaps we could work something out. Since we can assimilate non-customers, perhaps that could...motivate them to become customers. What could you offer us in return?

Mons: What problems are you having with your shield generator?

"I can offer the Borg several services, most involving the exploration and seeking out of new species with which to trade and, possibly, assimilate. Hey, since you're going to assimilate them, mind if I sell them some last minute, ah, 'used' weapons?"

*Via long range communicator....*  Dang nabbit Rover, you dented the door.....When you get back here, you will have some serious work layed out for you....Last time someone dented one of my hanger's, I made them paint the whole hangerbay...with a tooth brush*


Nerd, I see you took my big brother with you.....Have him pick me up some special sause

droid enters carrying toothbrush...(and large quantities of Rum and boxes of Cuban cigars)...proceeds to scrub deck, but no-one notices what s/he/it is carrying, so being... unenlightened...(as droids are wanna be's)...falters, falls under the weight of even this compact mode...and all of the goodies spill across the deck and begin to tumble through an open bay door!!!

Hearing a large clatter, looks up an sees a tumbling bunch of boxes....Cases of RUM and cuban cigars...Rushes over, and starts stacking things in a very secure cabinet.  Finds a droid under the stack, relentlessly scrubbing the deck.

Reprograms the droid, giving it specific instructions to follow Rover carring the toothbrush and whinning loudly that Rover needs to scrub down the hanger with this scrub brush as soon as he returns.  Locks out the droids program controls with a special access code, so that it can not be reprogrammed from this duty.  Orders it to wait at the airlock door for Rover.  Sprays it down with super-duper shielding spray to prevent it from being damaged or destroyed, even by a direct hit from a super "rito"  (Dingo forgets to put in a end program key when hanger deck is scrubbed by Rover, so program ends up in a loop)

droid registers weird ancient code bouncing off shield:  poing poing poing splat splat splat poing poing poing...its programming recognises the call for 'ritos... the reverberation resounds around its little metallic brain ...it shivers and shakes and rocks back and forth until...finally it breaks through the shield... and falls through the bay door...in multiple pieces...and into...The Void!!!

"Wow... that was WEIRD! Cerberus, get some special sauce when we get to the port. Three cases. Yeah...yeah... no, I don't think so."

Am I the only one who can pull a ship out of the hanger by the book?

"In a word yes. Oh, yes, by the way, if the ISS STFU needs some more drugs, we can pick those up too, although you didn't hear it from me!"

Right now I am having a big juicy steak with the universes best rum.

Now about that punishment.You know I hold the juice to the ship. Take it away and I will come back don't and I will enjoy myself here on Aron. I will hire my robot Max to come and do the work. Next time I am going to blow the door if I run into it :) (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/smile.gif ):).

Here is what I have....

100,000 Kilos of Rum
1,000,000,000 Kilos of Alcohol
500,000 Kilos of Vodka
1,000,000 Bottles of Corona (its a lot better over here)
1000 Kilos of Wiskey(they were short ok)

I have proposed that we make a emergency alcohol reserve. I have got 5,000,000,000 Kilos of alcohol.

Total---- 600,000,000,000,000 credits

Don't worry about the bill. The crew is more important. I think I will add my rum and steak to the bill.

I have decided to use my leave time now. I will be back in 10 days. Tell the people in the bar that if they add soap and lemons to water they will be fine.It doesn't taste good though.

Better add that to the list in case of emergency.

1,000,000 Lemons
500,000 bars of soap (best soap in the universe also)

I think I will add the tip to the bill also.

Total----- 900,000,000,000,000 credits

Who should I send the bill to?


Nerd i doing fine here.He decided to stay also (he doesn't have the keys to the car :) (http://www.ezboard.com/intl/aenglish/images/emoticons/smile.gif ):) ). I will let him give a progress report.

Rover out...

Would report on the bill, but Nerd seems to have passed out, crushed by the huge bill with all the zeros on it. Zero after zero after zero after SOGGING ZERO!
"I... I think we need a MAJOR credit card!"

If by 'used', you mean, defective, we have no problem with it. We are wondering, however: if your service to us is providing us species to assimilate, that would eventually work to your disadvantage. How do you propose this system be set up so that both parties recieve equal compensation for their efforts?

"Well, maybe you could assimilate only half of a species, so that there'd be more left, then dissappear suddenly and without warning, leaving the idiots mouths gaping while I hand out "free" samples of U-subs. Sounds like a plan."

No. Borg do not half-assimilate a race, not intentionally, at least.

Hmmm. Kay and I get back from another secret MiB mission, and what do I find? Our scout/pilot dude gone rogue.

Come to the Admiral, Rover. Here, boy. Be a good puppydog and c'mere. Here, boy. The newspaper is this way.

And, crew, don't sweat the beverage sitch. Dingy and I can, between us, whip up a little alcohol fermentation and extraction still using just what we have on board. We're talking PGA, Everclear, neat hooch. Not exactly Jack Daniels, but it will definitely do.

Oh, hi, Kay. Care to give us a hand with the still?

Hi, darlin'. Well, that...wasn't quite what I had in mind. But what the h#!!. Where ya want it?

(Hush, Kay. Behave. Dingo's here.)

Good news. I just discovered Doc Pete already has a still in the Tardian bar adjunct. We don't have to build one. He's got a nice brew coming out already, and all we have to do are some mods to produce some other beverage types, and we're back in business!

Welcome back Admiral...We need your assistance...The replicator is down.  We our out of lemons to make your Electric lemonade.

I have heard from Rover, he has been running up quite a bill trying to resupply the bar.  He damaged my hanger bay.

I have one quick question.  How come we have a bill here for the honeymoon suite from the planet Avalon, with your's and agent K's name on it????

Dingo: Where's all the cases of rum I ordered?  I see that it was received and it looks like Rover signed it out but I don't see...  Oh my god.  Please tell me he didn't take it with him.  Please tell me this.  I see he's up to Warp 60.  If all my rum is gone, he's going to have to go faster than that to out run me!
:bad (http://bbs2.fanforum.com/images/smilies/spank.gif ):bad

AOB:  The shield generator problems are centered around the transvariant field coils.  They will not boost the power grid over 15.8% while the ship in stationary.  Can you give me a hand with it?  It's driving me crazy!
:puke (http://bbs.artistdirect.com/images/smilies/sick.gif ):puke

To all Crew: If AOB can help out with the shield problems, the ISS BozoBlaster will be 100%.  All other systems are 5X5.

Mons  :ESK (http://community.theunderdogs.org/smiley/armed/ar15.gif ):ESK

PLC-
I really don't feel like doing that while I am here.I am sitting on the beach drinking an electric lemonade and I am lazy. I will send a droid to do that.

BTW- I am glad the crew can cope with that stuff.Be back in 10 days.

Dingo-

I ain't going to even comment. Rover out....... (and just in time)

BTW- Someone looted the Delta Wing and we caught them. He gave us drinks at the bar and we gave him guns. For some reason there was a mass murder last night. Besides Nerd's giving spirit.
Nerd Report------------

He has been causing some problems with the locals. They think they guns we give them are magic so they shoot themselves with it. Other than that I have yet to give you Nerd's bill.He is the merchant so expect a higher bill.

Other than that I hope you don't mind me and Nerd having a dog fight on Arons moon on the 11th day. Don't worry I won't use the delta wing. They give you little ship to blow each other to pieces.Should be fun.

Add that to the bill.

2,000,000,000 credits

500,000,000 credits for ammo for fight.

If there are too many Aronian's me and Nerd will be on a team to blow them up.I have yet to ask Nerd if he knows how to fly the pod. If he doesn't add 500,000,000,000 credits for 4 days of learning.

I am sending a rented pod to WAN to pick up Mons. This is for building the BB 2. It should be there any minute.

add 4,000,000,000 credts to the bill.

Don't worry. If you want me to send the bill to Art Bell I will.

Aloha..... Rover out...

Mons, no I stored most of the rum.....the usual place.

Rover, no I am not worried about the bill, you can discuss it with the Admiral.

You best have a HUGE shipment coming back, lets face it, you have spent 200 times the cost of building the BB 2

About sending the bill to Art Bell....can't.  They have their border sealed, and no ships have been in or out of it.  Your supplies would know that little fact...Besides Bozospace is DRY.

Oh, by the way, the WAN is only authorized to pay for expenses only in the cost of resupply and transportation.  All other costs come out of your own pocket.  We do authorize acommodations at the El-Cheapy Roach Motel.  Any costs for improved quarters, is out of pocket expenses

Hey hey I hold the ships fuel. I can take a 1 month vacation if I feel like it so I would pay the bill to my ***** star hotel.

1,000,000,000,000 per day = 10 days= 10,000,000,000,000 credits.

You know... we can be fugiti