Chapter 5: Bozo in our midst.....

[Sarah90]

Wanda dahling!...(says Sarah90 as she enters in fluffy socks)...Gets drawn by Yalie's Giant Magnets...toddles forth and locates Art Bell;  (then looks deep into Dingo's eyes...Ooops, ain't 'Librarian' - that's Sunspotfever/Matahari !

(Sarah departs, tiptoeing softily - cos she has fluffy socks - courtesy of Wanda... ... ...

Oops!  Didn't ask for permission to come aboard at all, at all! in the first place?   O...ohh!   Could be in Big Trouble !)

[Nemisis two]

(Portal opens, out steps Nemisis2. He's followed by the altered mighty mouse theme, causing any crew on the verge of being illogiced to snap out of it by the annoying music)
I'm back, Admiral need de-briefing on current events/pending missions that may require the WAN fleet.

[The Borg Collective]

Is it safe yet?

[Nemisis two]

Amiral, my portal to SDC space is somehow being jammed by bozo illogic devices, i no longer have the ability to maintain a permanent hold into SDC space.
I'm trying to install a dimensional anchor but it's not working.

Labatt, bring the WANIV into OrstioSpace, i have a feeling it's gonna be here for a while.

Decon crews prepare a holding tank for Nerd57 he's been bozofied and needs help, Laughi and the Dracone are bringing him here.

[The Borg Collective]

Everyone but us seems to be infected in some way. We are recalling all of our vessels to Borg space, and are monitoring AOB very closely...

[The Borg Collective]

Our personal picture is now working. One problem solved at least.

[Nemisis two]

(As Nemisis2 rounds a corner a nanobot get him, he begins to tell jokes but without telling the punch lines.
He runs up to skyjim and barrages him with even more meaningless jokes then what he'd been telling)

Why'd the turtle cross the road?

Why is a elephant gray?

[Nemisis two]

PO IS HERE!!!

Either that or someones playing a sick joke, right now he's logged in.
(With that Nemisis2 slips back into bozosity)

[nerd57 Laugi]

[My name is Termina, Nemy! Nerd's ship is the Draconis. Laugi is a member of the Dracone race! Ohh, he can't get my name right! I'll destroy the Universe!]
"Quiet! Give me remote control of the Draconis. We have to fly her over to OS AES while we stay in SDC. Ohh Gesuit, I'm confused..."

Meanwhile, in AES:
"PO! You are my HERO! I want to nuke my way into space too! Its harmless! And what's with all these damned eco-wackies? Don't they understand that its the only way to travel in space? Regardless of the fact that the ship I'm using is a billion times more efficient?"

[Oh dear "Matt". Its worse than we thought!]
"Matt? Whose Matt? Uber-being Matt?"
[No matter, we have to get him to OS]

[Nemisis two]

(Accidently saying a joke that has no answer, nemisis2 manages to fight the nanode)
Laughi...keep back...illogic nanodes taking over crew...
(Starts going into a illogical trance)
Art is good
Art is wise
Ummmmmmmmm
Art is good
Art is wise
Ummmmmmmmm

[Peter]

Whaaattzzz that? *hick* I maby drunk azz hell, but I can still aim... *hick* a bit..

PO here??

*rams 2 cartridges in the holes of his shotgun*

AH! I zee him now!

*aiming at silouette of suspected PO*

*pulls trigger*

*Cloud of little metal balls blast a wall decoration next to Nemisis2*

"Zhit, missed him...AH... tis only Nem... *hick* Nem is okay... nems jokes not okay... but Nem more important than his jokes! AHA loggick!! Me not affected by bozobots... *hick* NOwwhere wazz POo?"

*Peter stumbles against the wall, looks surprised, and then stumbles farter through the corridor... *

Peter

[Nemisis two]

Ummmmmm
Art is good.
Could've sworn i saw him.
Art is wise.
Ummmmmm

(Nemisis stands up after Pete shoots at him, looks around and heads off toward his ship trying to fight the bozobots)

Hmmmmmm
Art might not be good.
Art might not be wise.

[nerd57 Laugi]

The DTV Draconis suddenly blinks in from AES space, appearing in a cloud of BOZONTIUM, carried with it through the blink.
[Ohhh, I didn't know think that would happen.]
"SOG! SOGING SHIP! WAN! PUT UP YOUR DEFENSES! THE BOZONTIUM MAKES YOU BELIEVE THAT IT IS ELEMENT NUMBER 150! I REPEAT, IT MAKES YOU BELIEVE IN THE CYDONIA FACE! RUN! RUUUUUUN!" Laugi screamed at the top of his lungs.

Meanwhile, on the Draconis:
"I'm a little Nuclear device! Destructive and stout!
This is my trigger, this is my snout!
When I get too hot, hear me shout,
'You have three minutes left to live'"
"Ahh nukes, the only way to fly!"

[Dear me! Someone PLEASE help him! Nemy! I know you can save him Nemy! You're the BEST Nemy!]
"NOT AGAIN!"

[The Borg Collective]

*The Borg send out a probe, not a probe ship, just a probe, about the size of a standard photon torpedo. It flies using normal warp flight, for fear the Bozos may tap into the transwarp conduits. As it approaches the WAN, it sends an automated message:*

We are sending you more nanoprobes. We are sending three types, they are as follows:

1. Basic probes, programmed to seek and destroy Bozo probes using conventional physical attack. They do not assimilate the probes.

2. Neural probes, designed to shut down brain functions. Helpful if sedatives do not work. May be used in conjunction with group 1.

3. Security probes. Specialy designed for this event, these probes do not require a living organism. They can be released into a ship environment. They will use minute amounts of ships elements to reproduce themselves at a high rate. Upon finding Bozos or any Bozo elements, including probes, they swarm it and construct a physical barrier around it, containing it until WAN crew can neutralize it.

Use them as you will. We are not responsible for any anti-nanoprobe securities the Bozos may have.

[dingo15068]

Institute Bozo Nano-bot self destruct sequence Alpha 1..... Execute Code "Art Bell is King" Execute Execute Execute...As Dingo passes back out from sever injuries.
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All Bozo Nano-bots self-destruct. All infected crew members pass out in extream pain